Quotables

just a sample of the daily texts/conversations i have...

me - "are you going to the devotional?"
billy - "no, i've already seen elder hales live."
me - "because he's a band right?"
erin - "yes, elder hales and the seventy."

heather - "how's spencer and what's her name? lipstick?"

kimbre - "hi are you teaching tomorrow?"
me - "no. thankfully. i'm using the swine excuse."
kimbre - "nice. or you could abstain from lying and go with the strep."
me - "i could, but home church is much more fun."
kimbre - "i know. you guys should bless the muffins you made."
me - "we should. maybe i should lay my hands on them."
kimbre - "definetely."
me - "would you come if i assigned you the closing prayer?"
kimbre - "thrown in a musical number and maybe i'll consider it."
me - "caitlin is going to sing party in the usa."
kimbre - "i'm so there."
me - "i'll save you a seat on the couch."

billy - "that doesn't even look like garrett."
stephen - "i know it looks like arnold schwarzenegger."

nicole- "is it just me, or are the jonas brothers' pants getting tighter every time they're on tv? pretty soon they're just going to be dancing torsos."
me - "i know, it can't be good for their future kids."
nicole - "if you're going to wear a promise ring, saving yourself for marriage, what kind of promise will that be for your wife when you're unable to have sex due to tight pants? you're lying from day one."

stephen - "when i'm a god i hope i have a triton."

me - "happy birthday jeff."
jeff - "thanks buddy."
me - "twenty-four years ago today you were in heaven holding hands with all the angels singing saturday warriors' songs waiting to be born. what a great day."

caitlin - "but you don't match."
billy - "it doesn't matter if i match. i usually just match with awesomeness. my shirt is awesome. my shoes are awesome. my pants are awesome."

me - "so how was your date? how was she?"
cole - "oh you know, she's cool. she's hot. she's nice, she's funny."
me - "oh, sounds like you really got to know her."

stephen -"why would she not make out with me? how could she resist?"
me - "really?"

me - "i updated my blog."
nicole - "that's so funny. i love it."
me - "but you didn't comment."
nicole - "ugh, it's so much effort but if i do, i get the nobel peace prize."
me - "done."